this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
