belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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