I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
