she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
