Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
