Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I believe in your delicious
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
