Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
