Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Randomize
