DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize
