yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
