Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
