Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
