Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I miss vodka workout Fridays
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
