I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
