I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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