It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
