Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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