Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize