So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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