they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
