Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
