Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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