People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
