I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
