Umm I'm too high to move.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
