can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Randomize
