Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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