I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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