marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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