Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
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