Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
