Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
