so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
