Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
