Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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