Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
