i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Randomize
