I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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