It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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