If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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