i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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