I bet he comes in French.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
