he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
