ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
