I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize