So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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