Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
