Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
