Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize