We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
