ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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