you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
